Sunday, May 18, 2008

what would you do?

mistakes, we all do it. it is the way we perceive it that differs. some people will take it as a lesson in life, some people will regret what they do, some people just have no choice. but mistakes is one chapter in life that non of us can escape from. but what happens if you are not the one deciding how you want to solve you own mistake?

some mistakes don't to a certain extend, it may be reversible. but most of it, once occurred,  it is like spilt milk which will be difficult to recollected. because of that, many of use will than live with guilt which will take a long time to fade or in many cases, never fades till the day you are buried 6 feet under. perhaps that's why people always say, prevention is better than cure. but what if the mistake was done naively, or accidentally? 

i was brought up to think of the things i do, and face the consequences of my actions. basically, i was brought up to feel guilty and feel responsible for my own wrong doings. maybe to you it sounds wrong, or stupid, to me it's norm. i know i can't sleep peacefully on mistakes i do till i know that i have at least try to straighten things. i wonder how if i do a mistake so huge, i have to live with guilt all my life.

i have a soft spot, especially towards people that i love and care dearly about, about knowing or finding out about mistake of others and finding out about the consequences they have to face. as cliche as it might sound, but i feel bad and sad for them. i tend to imagine myself in that situation, facing the same things they have to go through, i cant help but feel dearly for them. it's the same sick and helpless feeling, knowing that you will only look from far and see what you hope is not their biggest life's mistake, happening to them.

the thought alone makes me sad and sigh loudly. but there's not much i can do, a big part of me cares a lot for the people around me, the other part bigger part can't do anything about it. maybe it's the way i perceive things, maybe it's not how it looks like to me. i just hope and pray for the best for them. i only wish you are still close and talking to me...

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